...And the Frustrations Mount

Nearing the close of the Semester 1 and coming ever so much more close to presenting our "actions" or "implementation" process to my in SWSP7123: Community Planning, Engagement and Government I am becoming more and more frustrated with this project.  Yes, I understand that we can "fail gloriously" but time doesn't even seem to afford me that.  As an international student, I feel even more constrained by time limitations, because not only am I expected to take 4 courses full time and maintain high grades in those in order to stay in the country and keep my funding, but I also expect this of myself, I am still learning the area and trying to explore and still feel very poorly connected with the city, town and University (University of Queensland).  Resources are abound, there are many opportunities but I feel given my personal limitations that the help I want, desire and need are just out of reach.

In addition, communicating solely via email with my three contacts in the U.S. is proving to be difficult.  It's a fairly well known fact that amongst those involved in 4-H as volunteers, employees and as members, you tend to spread yourself too thin and well, the folks I am working with are pretty thin as it is.  Emails are far and few between and often responses are usually received in about 2weeks time.  Speaking of which I need to send a reminder in order to get a response.  Also, because of my limitations and lack of ability to be physically available meetings and discussions I have given my personal okay, for the understanding that things move at their own pace and not being physically being there to spur them forward, I have allowed others to take up the reigns when it comes to facilitating any sort of action.  Whether there have been any to date, I am unaware--again physical limitations and distance have hindered my ability to see if any progress has been made at the ground levels.

I also had it quite blatantly expressed that one of my ideas, regarding the utilization of Facebook was just not appropriate because of the way "rumors spread."  And according to many individuals working and volunteering in with the 4-H Organization within King County, WA, the Internet and Facebook are "uncharted territories" and are pretty much "the wild, wild west" when it comes to 4-H.  Despite the fact that when I checked out the 4-H Network Blog, I was quite surprised to see that they have their own YouTube video network with many interesting YOUTH produced films (http://www.youtube.com/user/4HNetworkNews).   This was one of my ideas that may come to fruition and that County Level admin saw as a real possibility given time constraints for them and for this particular class project. The production of a Youth made film regarding the 'good things' each current 4-Her within the county has experienced was really welcomed.  Everything else, thus far, quite shut down.

In addition, there was confusion over what my actual project was going to be about.  Most former 4-Hers when doing Graduate Projects around 4-H are engaging in some sort of "research" and because of the programs basis and early development, as well as current connections with research based, land grant Universities, "research" is a great idea!  As most of us are aware, numbers sell ideas in the U.S. and most Developed Countries, not some little Community Development project.

This being said, I'm not giving up.  I will continue to blog, albeit irregularly and I will keep trying to send my emails.  It seems with every other email huge leaps are taken forward and people are excited and ready to to get moving right in stead with me.  As soon as they speak with others, the next email is a bit disheartened and "questions" have been raised about purpose, relevance and most of all child/youth safety.  I suppose in this particular case it is simply my job to keep spirits up and to keep people positive (even though I'm feeling pretty crummy about the whole thing too).  We will see, what my reminder brings and if anything at all comes to fruition between today May 12th and June 2nd.

Until we meet again (which will be in the very new future...)!
-A